Just wanna let this story die, and I'll be alright
Yes, that title are lyrics from Ariana Grande's new song. Even though her song is about forgetting someone you loved, this blog post is about forgetting the past few months.
The past few months for me have just been AWFUL! I don't know if I'm the only one but I can't believe how much has gone wrong in so little time, I just wish the universe would just give me a break. I feel like I'm in a nightmare and I just can't wake up from it, and there just doesn't seem to be a light anymore.
Back in January I really started to hate my job, to the point before my shift I would cry in the car and on the way home I would bawl my eyes out. I finally said enough and started looking for a new job. It took me a month till I found a new job, I went for a trial shift and all went well, so I handed in my notice and was so exited to get out of such a toxic work environment. Cut to the night before I was supposed to start and I hadn't heard anything from him in a week. So I messaged him and I got no reply. The next morning I looked on indeed and saw my job that I was supposed to start. So yeah I basically became unemployed in the span of 12 hours.
That fact that all of that happened in just one week, it really has taken a toll on my mental health, to the point I'm going to therapy because my anxiety has never ever been as bad as it is right now, and I'm scared that my anxiety will take me back to a place I don't want to be in. The only time I feel truly happy and at peace is when I'm with my boyfriend, and I don't want to rely on him to be happy, I want to be happy, smiley Leah that doesn't cry practically every single day.
I need to make money somehow to run my car, pay my bills, pay for my lashes and nails and treat my mum and boyfriend because they deserve it for putting up with me this past month (lol) That is why I'm exited for the next chapter of my life. For so long I've wanted to be a baker and open up my own bakery, however that dream was shattered by the madness of last Christmas. So now my new career is Social Media Marketing. I think I've always wanted a career in social media ever since I was 14. Even though I don't have any qualifications in it or have a clue what I'm really doing, I'm so exited for this new chapter. To be my own boss, make my own money and create my own schedule. However I just wanna let this story to die and I'll be alright. If I can get passed these HORRID past 3 months, I know that everything will be alright and 2024 will be my year!
This post was really just a way of me getting everything out and aggressively typing on my laptop.
Thanks for reading :)
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